Hi All,
Well Thank you for all your support and for taking the time out to log on and check out my new ramblings.
It's seems to off been a busy week so far, and with the weather so nice, I've been out and about with May. Finally been able to sort out the garden! It was in such a state. It now looks like a garden. May has not been well either, teething still!
I went to see my Rheumy yesterday, who has finally put me on a treatment course. They have given me Methotrexate and a dose of folic acid for after! I was originally going straight to my job from the hospital but because of the new treatment, I was required to have blood tests, X-rays of my hands, feet and chest and then get my prescription from the hospital pharmacy. What a joke! blood test queue was not too bad, so that was quick however, when I got to the x-ray department they advised that I could be waiting 2-3 hours! All I can say is thank goodness for my DS LITE. Then I went to the pharmacy and got chatted up by a really old guy who stood extremely close to me and then promptly started to tell me how although he's old and has 4 kids, he still enjoys the practice of making babies! YUCK! It really made me smile although I really was not in the mood for old dirty men, I did have to smile at his odd sense of humour.
So, I've taken my new tablet and am turning slightly paranoid about side effects, I'm sat here waiting for something I expect to feel like a brick (again..over imagination running wild!). Nothing so far.
Hopefully this beautiful weather will last a little bit more, if it does I will go quiet again as I will be out playing! If I'm on here more, then it's because a)I'm ill and bored b)Weather is naff, bored and May in bed!
Bye for now!
Wednesday, 18 March 2009
Friday, 13 March 2009
Day - I can't remember!
Hi all,
Again.....it's been a while since I've written anything!
Computer problems plus getting a new part time job has taken time away from me.
Yes...I have a small temping job, 10 hours a week. It's very interesting and it's keeping my mind occupied, I have to try and learn Access!
I have my rheumy appointment on Tuesday coming so I am looking forward to telling her all my troubles and she giving me a new magic pill that's going to make everything better! (I wish anyway!) The doctor has given me some cream which is actually helping....it capsicum. I find that really helps when my joints are sore, especially my small joints.
May is nearly walking, she's getting so determined. She's very strong willed, just like her father!
I will update more later...I just wanted to let you know that I've not forgotten about you!
x
Again.....it's been a while since I've written anything!
Computer problems plus getting a new part time job has taken time away from me.
Yes...I have a small temping job, 10 hours a week. It's very interesting and it's keeping my mind occupied, I have to try and learn Access!
I have my rheumy appointment on Tuesday coming so I am looking forward to telling her all my troubles and she giving me a new magic pill that's going to make everything better! (I wish anyway!) The doctor has given me some cream which is actually helping....it capsicum. I find that really helps when my joints are sore, especially my small joints.
May is nearly walking, she's getting so determined. She's very strong willed, just like her father!
I will update more later...I just wanted to let you know that I've not forgotten about you!
x
Sunday, 1 March 2009
Day Six
Yahoo!!!! I've straigthened my hair today for the first time in 6 days!
Oh, what a difference a day makes!
As you can probably tell, i feel a whole lot better today. I've been making dinner, cleaning and playing with May. I feel so much better for getting my kitchen back from Jim unorganised mess. He has no clue how my kitchen runs. I'm in charge now and it's back to normal business. Yahoo!
(I've still got to be careful but hopefully getting back to normal!)
I saw mum today since our argument on Friday, everything seemed okay but I'll give her a hug tomorrow and ask if she's actually read this blog yet. Knowing my mother she most likely hasn't worked out how to click the link I sent to her email. (Hi Mum...when you do read this!)
Oh my life....I'm just watching a cop show....Three girls fighting! It's disgusting...how do women behave so badly? It give us women such a bad name. Lock them up and through away the key I say.
I'm shattered now so I'm going to bed. Night.
Oh, what a difference a day makes!
As you can probably tell, i feel a whole lot better today. I've been making dinner, cleaning and playing with May. I feel so much better for getting my kitchen back from Jim unorganised mess. He has no clue how my kitchen runs. I'm in charge now and it's back to normal business. Yahoo!
(I've still got to be careful but hopefully getting back to normal!)
I saw mum today since our argument on Friday, everything seemed okay but I'll give her a hug tomorrow and ask if she's actually read this blog yet. Knowing my mother she most likely hasn't worked out how to click the link I sent to her email. (Hi Mum...when you do read this!)
Oh my life....I'm just watching a cop show....Three girls fighting! It's disgusting...how do women behave so badly? It give us women such a bad name. Lock them up and through away the key I say.
I'm shattered now so I'm going to bed. Night.
Saturday, 28 February 2009
Day Five
Sorry I haven't updated since thursday. I had a really bad day yesterday. I had a huge argument with my mum, which just made me so upset tand the rest of the day was just shocking.
I didn't get up yesterday morning, i just felt so exhausted. I needed to have my hair straightened but needed someone to do it for me. Mum was going to do it, but when she came around, I was in a foul mood. Very frustrated and not in the mood for feeling ill again. She told me to stop stropping or she would go home, so i told her to go home! She did and we didn't talk all day. I went back to bed a cried all morning. I felt so angry, upset and mad that I had got myself into such a state.
Although trying to explain how you feel to a none pain ill person is like trying to explain sea sickness to someone who has never been on a boat! Making myself clear is the hardest thing for me, especially to my family. I always do it in a backwards horrible way, usually ending in an argument.
Anyway, I apologised for my shocking behaviour and now all is well on the family front.
I've decided that my next challenge is how to cope on my own with May. It's not so bad at home because she's very indepentant, but getting to and from the car is a nightmare. Lifting in and out, bags and the kitchen sink. I don't want to wish her age away, but I can't wait till I can say to her 'May, get in the car!'.
Today has been a better day, i've actually been out this morning! First time in 5 days. Hopefully on the right track. I've got things planned this week, like housework and dentist on Tuesday! I've just got to remember not to do too much or i'll over do it again and be back to squre one.
I can't believe it is saturday already, where does time go?
p.s I don't have spell check on my mac so i am sorry!
I didn't get up yesterday morning, i just felt so exhausted. I needed to have my hair straightened but needed someone to do it for me. Mum was going to do it, but when she came around, I was in a foul mood. Very frustrated and not in the mood for feeling ill again. She told me to stop stropping or she would go home, so i told her to go home! She did and we didn't talk all day. I went back to bed a cried all morning. I felt so angry, upset and mad that I had got myself into such a state.
Although trying to explain how you feel to a none pain ill person is like trying to explain sea sickness to someone who has never been on a boat! Making myself clear is the hardest thing for me, especially to my family. I always do it in a backwards horrible way, usually ending in an argument.
Anyway, I apologised for my shocking behaviour and now all is well on the family front.
I've decided that my next challenge is how to cope on my own with May. It's not so bad at home because she's very indepentant, but getting to and from the car is a nightmare. Lifting in and out, bags and the kitchen sink. I don't want to wish her age away, but I can't wait till I can say to her 'May, get in the car!'.
Today has been a better day, i've actually been out this morning! First time in 5 days. Hopefully on the right track. I've got things planned this week, like housework and dentist on Tuesday! I've just got to remember not to do too much or i'll over do it again and be back to squre one.
I can't believe it is saturday already, where does time go?
p.s I don't have spell check on my mac so i am sorry!
Thursday, 26 February 2009
Again, not a good day! Really painful hands today so won't be able to type for long. I realised that may last few blogs have been very whiny. So I'm sorry, it's not the intention to be sad and morbid. I want my blogs to be insightful and humorous, not sad and depressing. I will try to improve on this. And if all else fails I will just post a funny picture or something!
We had a leak in the bathroom this morning....I decided after 3 days of being in bed to have a nice hot deep bath. Jim has to help me in and out, so while i was soaking, May was running up and down the hall way in her walker and Jim is talking to me sat on the bath. The bath was very full and started to run down the overflow. Jim said that it didn't sound right, it sounded like it was leaking. I told him to stop being so silly, what on earth does a leak sound like??? 15 mins later after he washed my hair for me, he went sown to the kitchen directly below the bathroom. The floor was an inch under water! Oops. He was right, it had leaked! I felt so bad, but never mind, it got fixed and all was better.
I still have to teach him how to use the straighteners!
That's me done for today. Hopefully tomorrow is better.
We had a leak in the bathroom this morning....I decided after 3 days of being in bed to have a nice hot deep bath. Jim has to help me in and out, so while i was soaking, May was running up and down the hall way in her walker and Jim is talking to me sat on the bath. The bath was very full and started to run down the overflow. Jim said that it didn't sound right, it sounded like it was leaking. I told him to stop being so silly, what on earth does a leak sound like??? 15 mins later after he washed my hair for me, he went sown to the kitchen directly below the bathroom. The floor was an inch under water! Oops. He was right, it had leaked! I felt so bad, but never mind, it got fixed and all was better.
I still have to teach him how to use the straighteners!
That's me done for today. Hopefully tomorrow is better.
Wednesday, 25 February 2009
Day Three
I was thinking about what I said yesterday, I don't think people understand exactly what our invisible illnesses really do to us.
I've spent the last few years trying to hide my illness in fear that people will not believe what I have. When I have been asked how I am, I just say 'I'm fine' when really I am not. I think this has been because I have some fear for what people think and want to be accepted. Being different is very hard and is hard to come to terms with.
Today, I have been poorly again. I have shocking shooting pains in my arms and wrists, not to mention the back ache. I am currently sat on a heat pad in an attempt to sooth the pain, is it working - No, but my butt is nice and warm! The only time i feel like that now is when I've had a good dose of steroids! LOL. I'm currently taking codeine (note to others - be careful, it bungs you up to no end. I felt like I was giving birth again! sorry for the detail but feel it important to warn other!) as well as another 20 tablets a day. Problem is half of them you need to take with food so I end up eating all day long just so I can take my tablets.
May has gone to her grandmother's again. Yesterday grandma noticed a tooth coming through, finally she is getting some teeth! She has been teething since she was three months old. Again I can't stop feeling bad that I can't look after her. I worry that May is unhappy. Me being paranoid again.
I also feel depressed, seeing the same four walls for a week is horrible. I just want to go back 10 years when I felt normal. I always imagine walking on a beautiful spring day, sun shining with not a care in the world. Was the world really like that when i was a child or was it that I lived in lar lar land. I think maybe the later, my mum and dad obviously did a good job.
Jim is out at work and I have to try to arrange to get to the bank, another job I hate. Standing in a queue waiting for Mr money man at the front of the queue who seems to think he has all the time in the world and so has everyone else behind him. Wanting to scream because of the pain, we stand patiently waiting to take our turn! What is with this country and queue's???
My mum is picking me up when she finishes work at 2pm so that we can go get May and bring her home!
I've got to go make myself presentable to the world now, so that I don't scare anyone! This takes a while. I may update later, I'll see how I feel! Bye for now!
I've spent the last few years trying to hide my illness in fear that people will not believe what I have. When I have been asked how I am, I just say 'I'm fine' when really I am not. I think this has been because I have some fear for what people think and want to be accepted. Being different is very hard and is hard to come to terms with.
Today, I have been poorly again. I have shocking shooting pains in my arms and wrists, not to mention the back ache. I am currently sat on a heat pad in an attempt to sooth the pain, is it working - No, but my butt is nice and warm! The only time i feel like that now is when I've had a good dose of steroids! LOL. I'm currently taking codeine (note to others - be careful, it bungs you up to no end. I felt like I was giving birth again! sorry for the detail but feel it important to warn other!) as well as another 20 tablets a day. Problem is half of them you need to take with food so I end up eating all day long just so I can take my tablets.
May has gone to her grandmother's again. Yesterday grandma noticed a tooth coming through, finally she is getting some teeth! She has been teething since she was three months old. Again I can't stop feeling bad that I can't look after her. I worry that May is unhappy. Me being paranoid again.
I also feel depressed, seeing the same four walls for a week is horrible. I just want to go back 10 years when I felt normal. I always imagine walking on a beautiful spring day, sun shining with not a care in the world. Was the world really like that when i was a child or was it that I lived in lar lar land. I think maybe the later, my mum and dad obviously did a good job.
Jim is out at work and I have to try to arrange to get to the bank, another job I hate. Standing in a queue waiting for Mr money man at the front of the queue who seems to think he has all the time in the world and so has everyone else behind him. Wanting to scream because of the pain, we stand patiently waiting to take our turn! What is with this country and queue's???
My mum is picking me up when she finishes work at 2pm so that we can go get May and bring her home!
I've got to go make myself presentable to the world now, so that I don't scare anyone! This takes a while. I may update later, I'll see how I feel! Bye for now!
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